opp to help

thank You Jurnei for the night a week ago.
thank You that the homeless person saw good in me and asked me for help.
thank You that i fixed my initial reaction and helped her.
thank You that she and i listened to music for the half hour we rode in the car together.
thank You that she complimented my choice of music and enjoyed it.
thank You that she was alive that moment.

please watch over her for she is probably back to being alone and homeless.
please prepare for her, a meal in eternity that will last forever and taste immaculate.
please let her tread this dismal earth, as i do, for a little while longer, as i, for i know she has good in her.

peace

auroras Light

to my faithful Lights who shine within me and on me: You are my music that echoes from today's sorrow's and joy's. You catch me when i belay sky scrapers just to challenge death. You simplify the complications in my mind and even when i see how easily You love me .......... me? i still conjure more scenarios of disbelief. i stain myself with shame. and yet, You smile through me. i fill my burdens even more, but You lift me every morning as if i am as light as air. for to You, my heavy guilt's are weightless. but you know, my heart is weighed down. conflicted and torn. i thank You for always catching me when i fall. but instead, can You please do something about those who have pushed me off the cliffs? You hold my vengeance. please unleash them. and let me, also, jump out of Your clutches. into Your aurora, i ask to float again ... .... .... ....

dial

Jurnei my Trinity friends,
i am still angry.
but i am scraping off the scabs of anger.
and it is a daily thing.
so many scabs.  so many sores.  so many hurts.  and one mask.

i sit with thoughts of "where".
i stand in the midst of nowhere.
i kneel in hopes of everywhere.

my anger?  i am so close to doing things i no i shouldn't.  and i am far away from doing what i ought.

my terror?  visits me every second i breathe.

i try to gasp the drought of air.

Gain .... please let me rest tonight.

You Three, i thank You for what it will be like a million years from now.

help me to thank You for the now.

and help me to delete any negatives from my past.  they are scorched in me, though.

my scars just hide my horror.

my horror is lonely.

my lonely is ever.

my ever is unknown.

to where are You calling me?